Richie Writes
Advice From The Heart
continued...
Sunbed is ruining me!
Dear Richie
My electricity bill is always ten times my neighbours yet my only electrical item is a sunbed. I just can't bring myself to switch it off! I'm facing bankruptcy so what should I do?
Richie Writes: 2 words for you = FAKE TAN!
BR here I come!
Dear Richie
Where O where can I go to learn to be a train driver?
Richie Writes: Call my "How to be a train driver" Hotline, they should be able to give you all the info you need. Good Luck!
I want to be Pele!
Dear Richie
I have fantasies about playing for Brazil and dribbling the ball round the whole French football team (twice!) to score the winning goal in the World Cup final. Is this healthy?
Richie Writes: First of all but every item of Brazilian football kit you can find then practice being a greedy bastard on Sunday mornings, finally stick 2 pieces of 'Extra' chewing gum over your front teeth and you're nearly there!
Stop me Hogging!
Dear Richie
I find it impossible to play 2-touch football, where am I going wroung?
Richie Writes: Try removing the superglue from your football boots and this might help,
Please write to Rich as your problems are his problems.
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