KMLC25 - The Carling Black Label Striker Cup

The first appearance of Kylie Minogue's Love Children was 19 May 1990 (I'm a few days behind, sorry!)

After gathering at Rose Street in Even Swindon for the official photographs. It was off to the Link Centre for 2:30pm and the matches that awaited them.

'The Kylies' were drawn in Group 2 with 47 AD, Calne Electronics, Interlink and Lambourn Flesheaters. One of those opponents must have dropped out as the records show that only three games were played.

We don't know who the games were against but we know we opened with a one-all draw then followed that up with 2-0 and 6-2 defeats. The dream of glory was over and we didn't even win the prize for the team with the best name.

However the tiny acorn of that day at the Link grew into a decade of five/six-a-side fun and Sunday League adventure.

KMLC25 - where it all began

(Between the Sunday League seasons I'll be going back 25 years to talk about the games that took place of the the team that became KMLC FC. If that doesn't float your boat, please return in September for the new season.)

Before KMLC there was Kylie Minogue's Love Children. A team of friends that came together to play in the Carling Black Label Striker Cup in May 1990. That tournament was advertised in the Sun newspaper and a squad of seven was assembled to take part.

Why the crazy team name? Kylie Minogue was three years into her chart domination and her sugary-sweet ballads and Stock, Aitken and Waterman disco beats were a long way from our chosen listening of the time. But the key factor was that as well as a prize for winning the tournament there was a prize for the best name.

Shorts and socks were borrowed. T-shirts were bought, screen-printed with Miss Minogue's picture and painted with nicknames and letters spelling out M.I.N.O.G.U.E.

The team was ready. How would they get on? I'll let you know on Monday.

Club constitution

(Probably should have posted this first but it's worth a reminder to any new players that join before the new season)

1. NAME - The club shall be KMLC FC ('Kylie Minogue's Love Children FC') and shall be affiliated to The Wiltshire County Football Association.
2. OBJECTS - Its' objects shall be to provide Association Football for its' members and such social and recreative pursuits as may be deemed desirable by the committee.
3. OFFICERS - The officers shall consist of three, all of who will be elected/re-elected at the Annual General Meeting.
4. COMMITTEE - The club shall be controlled by a  general committee consisting of the officers and six other members of the exc=ecutive membership. One other member of the playing staff will be invited to attend each meeting.The general committee shall meet approximately once every month and the proceedings at such meetings shall be duly recorded in a minute book.At meetings of the general committee, five shall form a quorum
5. EXECUTIVE MEMBERSHIP - Members either playing or non-playing who pay monies into the KYLIE account at monthly intervals, during or outside of the regular football season, will be regarded as an executive member.
6. POWER OF COMMITTEES - The property and/or assets of the club shall be vested in the general committee.The general committee shall have the power to suspend or expel any member deemed guilty of conduct prejudicial to the good name of the club.The general committee shall have the power to fill such vacancies as may arise in its' constitution between Annual General Meetings.The general committee shall have power to declare a seat vacant should a member absent himself from two consecutive meetings without an explanation deemed to be satisfactory.
7. MEMBERSHIP - Membership shall consist of all playing and non-playing members. Candidates for election shall be proposed and seconded by club members. A register of members of the club shall be kept by the secretary. Membership fees shall be paid to the secretary at the time of signing on.
8. SUBSCRIPTION - The annual subscription to the club shall be: £5 for all playing members, payable at the time of signing on. Match fees payable by non-executive members shall be: £2.50 per full game, £1.75 if substitute/substituted. Executive members shall pay: £10 per month directly into Club account.
9. ANNUAL MEETING - The Annual General Meeting shall be held as close to 8 June as possible, but no later than 31 July in each year. The secretary shall give 21 clear days notice of such meetings to all members. The financial statement and secretaries' report shall be received by the meeting which will also elect the officers and general committees by ballot, appoint auditors and transact any other business.
10. EXTRAORDINARY GENERAL MEETING -An Extraordinary General Meeting may be convened by the general committee when deemed desirable and also upon the written request of members. The secretary shall give seven days notice to all members of such meeting at which five shall form a quorum.
11. FINANCE - The general committee shall cause to be kept proper books of account which shall be audited yearly. Official receipts for all monies received shall be signed by the secretary. The general committee shall authorise cheques to be signed by at least two of its' members.
12. ALTERATION TO THE RULES - No alteration in these rules shall be made except at the Annual General Meeting or an Extraordinary General Meeting convened for that purpose and only of supported by the majority of those present and voting at such meeting. Notice of proposed alterations to these rules must be given in writing to the secretary seven days prior to the Annual General Meeting or Extraordinary General Meeting and notified to members on notice of meeting.
13. OTHER BUSINESS - Any matters not governed by the foregoing rules shall be dealt with by the general committee, the decision of which body shall be final and binding.
14. MISCONDUCT - All members, playing or non-playing, will be subject to a code of conduct. A copy of this will be provided at the time of signing on. Code of Conduct, with suitable fines for infringement, will be reviewed by the disciplinary commitee set up within the framework of the general committee. Once agreed. Code of Conduct rules can only be altered at the Annual General Meeting or at an Extraordinary General Meeting. 
15. CODE OF CONDUCT - Bookings - All players responsible for paying fines. Sending Offs - All player responsible for paying offs. Each sending off to be reviewed by the committee with regard to internal discipline. Separate club fines may be applicable in addition to FA fines.
16. FINES - Dirty boots, No shin pads, Lateness, Not turning up at all.

1994/95 Moving on...

Two players to don the green and black stripes did so in this first season only.

Simon Haynes
Had been part of the wider Kylie family and played for the team in the small-sided games. After two substitute appearances in October, in the 6-0 win over Mannington and the 5-2 victory against Aldbourne (where he won spoons), the occasional striker decided Sunday football wasn't for him.

Steve Griffiths
Came on as sub in the first KMLC match and started in the first league game. His seven starts and five sub appearances were in midfield and dotted throughout the season. His two Kylie goals both came as a substitute in the 13-1 drubbing of Honda Logistics at Shrewsbury Road. Left without an MVP or Spoons to his name. Might be the only player to come on as sub and score twice - I'll let you know.

1994/95 MVP & Spoons

Simon just held off Brian's late charge to win MVP in the first season.

Four players tied with three Mr. Spoons votes. Simon taking a share of that too. Several players picked up a spoons but not an MVP but only Chris S. of the MVP winners didn't blot his spoons copybook.

	MVP	Spoons
Carpenter		1
Carter		1
Garratt	1	3
Gould	3	2
Gunning	3	1
Haynes		1
Howell	2	1
Kelly	1	1
Kibble	1	2
Lunt		2
Merry	3	3
Sharp		2
Shurmer	1	1
Smedley	2
Summers	2	3
Swatridge	5	3
Warr B.	3	1
Warr M.	2	1
Woolford	4	1

1994/95 Goalscorers

Simon's excellent mid-season form saw him comfortably top of the goalscoring charts in the first season.

	League		Cup		Total
	Goals		Goals		Goals
Carter	1				1
Gould	14		1		15
Griffiths	2				2
Gunning	14		1		15
Howell	1				1
Kelly	1				1
Kibble	3				3
Merry	13				13
Sharp	1				1
Smedley	5				5
Swatridge	26				26
Warr B.	3				3
Woolford	1				1

1994/95 Appearances

Ian Merry was the only ever-present in the first season, starting all 24 league matches plus the two cup games.

	League			Cup			Total
	Appearances	Sub		Appearances	Sub		Appearances	Sub	Total
Carpenter	8			1			9	0	9
Carter	13	3		2			15	3	18
Garratt	13			2			15	0	15
Gould	17			1			18	0	18
Gratland	8	5			1		8	6	14
Griffiths	7	4			1		7	5	12
Gunning	22			2			24	0	24
Haynes		2					0	2	2
Howell	16						16	0	16
Kelly	9	4			1		9	5	14
Kibble	10			1			11	0	11
Lunt	11	3					11	3	14
Merry	24			2			26	0	26
Sharp	5	6		2			7	6	13
Shurmer	4	3		1			5	3	8
Smedley	15			1			16	0	16
Summers	15	5		1			16	5	21
Swatridge	20			1			21	0	21
Warr B.	14	1		1	1		15	2	17
Warr M.	14	2		2			16	2	18
Woolford	19			2			21	0	21

1994/95 Division 8 final league table

The Kylies' first Sunday League season saw them finish third behind Akers and Swindon Ambulance.

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts		Home		Away
1	Akers Garage Sports	24	17	5	2	150	54	96	39		3-6		2-4
2	Swindon Ambulance	24	14	6	4	60	43	17	34		3-5		2-1
3	KMLC FC	24	13	4	7	86	56	30	30		~		~
4	The Grapes	24	12	4	8	80	58	22	28		7-1		2-2
5	Mannington	24	11	5	8	63	57	6	27		6-0		1-0
6	ISSC	24	11	4	9	83	57	26	26		0-0		2-2
7	AFC Purton	24	11	4	9	55	56	-1	26		0-3		2-0
8	Stratton Red Eagles	24	12	1	11	91	68	23	25		3-2		0-3
9	Aldbourne SSC	24	9	4	11	68	76	-8	22		5-2		2-3
10	Halcrow Wilts	24	7	3	14	60	99	-39	17		7-4		4-3
11	Borough Press	24	7	3	14	61	101	-40	17		4-2		4-5
12	The Harrow	24	5	2	17	35	84	-49	12		2-2		7-2
13	Honda Logistics	24	3	3	18	27	110	-83	9		5-1		13-1

Akers ending up comfortable winners but the Kylies will be disappointed not to have taken second place from Swindon Ambulance. A 5-3 defeat to those opponents in November turned out to be a real four-pointer.

Even with that defeat KMLC will rue dropped points to teams lower down the league, particularly Aldbourne and Borough Press.

Better luck next season!